Another month bites the dust.

This has been one hectic month!  I have never been so tired (‘sleep deprived’ has become my middle name). I have never seen so many medicine standing in the kitchen and I have never been sick so often.  I just feel totally deflated.  But yet, from somewhere, I have the energy and the strength to stand up in the morning to get ready for work.

Not one day in February was “sick-free”.  Baby girl started off having a runny nose, stomach bug, cold and now inflammation in the ear. Of course, we want to, once again, blame the teeth and those terrible germs at the daycare.  The two bottom teeth have cut through and now we are waiting for the two top ones to arrive, anxiously.

I was really hoping for an easy transition from maternity leave to work, from home to daycare, but alas, it has been totally chaotic. Here’s some advise, stay at home and get extra help when you want to take time for yourself. And please, take time for yourself, don’t feel bad.  Because if you are not feeling well, your baby is not going to feel well either and if you going to get annoyed, because you haven’t gotten any sleep (for the last 18 months) well, then there will just be bad consequences. Your partner will not understand why you are acting this way, you’re not going to be happy because they don’t understand and it just becomes a terrible roller coaster ride.  By the way, I don’t think anyone really knows how you feel.  Not even your best friend who has given birth to two or more kids. So yes, I don’t even have any other advise, because nothing has worked for us.  Not even the infamous amber necklace. No cough syrup, no rescue remedy, no antibiotics.  I have just told myself to take each day as it comes.  This too shall pass. One day…

So here’s the thing.  There will be babies that you don’t even know have cut their first tooth (Oh look love, she’s got two teeth this morning!) and then there are babies that will get really irritated with cutting teeth.  Baby girl threw us into the deep side of the ocean and got all the symptoms you can think of.  Diarrhea, fever, cold, ear infection, runny nose, drooling, chewing everything, not eating, only drinking milk, only want yogurt, OK, now I’ll eat maybe some chicken symptoms.  It’s bad.  It’s really bad.  The great thing is, they don’t remember a thing, but you on the other hand….well, that’s just part of parenting. Just keep on loving life! Bring on March, we’ll kick your ass too 😉

 

Go with your gut feeling

In my recent conversations with parents with young children, I have noticed that a lot of us like to blame teething for many of our babies behaviours, whether it be the constant crying, moaning, coughing, pooping, chewing, drooling, sleepless nights, you name it, it’s because of those darn teeth.  After this week, I think it’s better just to go with your gut feeling and not assume that is because of those darn teeth…

We started off the morning with a very runny diaper.  Pretty much covered her up to her neck. This of course happening whilst we decided to go have breakfast at a nice restaurant. Of Course.  Then another pooping incident at home whilst sitting on me. Yes, I was covered in poop. Of Course.  Then the evening, not wanting to sleep because of her tummy rumbling, another pooping incident, covering the carpet with poop (and the next morning I noticed at work, also my feet). Of Course.  I have had not at much sleep at all.  Trying to change that diaper as soon as I hear somethings happening, to avoid a horrible nappy rash.

Of course the nappy rash became just worst once she was back at play school, because the teacher did not smell anything, so poor baby girl was sitting in ‘acid’ for few minutes.  Poor Baby Girl. 😦  Sudocrem works wonders.  Not only for babies, but even for adults as well.  So we have been smearing her with heaps of cream! After two days I decided enough is enough.  We got to sort this shit out (pardon the pun).  I went to chemist, told my story, lo and behold, was told that there is a stomach virus in the air! Baby Girl had a bad bug in her tummy!  So we got some medicine to take away the virus and help with the discomfort.  It is going so much better.  Poop is not yet the right consistency, but the colour is perfect.  Look at me describing poop.  Never would I have though that this would be so important subject. Poop.

So before you want to blame the teeth for all sort of behaviour.  Rather visit your clinic or pediatrician to make sure that nothing else is bothering your baby.

And now we wait for those teeth to cut through and constant crying, moaning, coughing, pooping, chewing, drooling and sleepless nights…

 

Monday Bluezzzzzzz

Two weeks have gone by in a flash!  I am full steam back at work and baby girl has just gotten use to her new friends.  The Teacher reassured me that it takes about two weeks for the kiddies to adapt to their new ‘home’ for the day and yes, it took two weeks for her to settle into a new routine.  She is loving it.  Smiles every morning when I go drop her off (yes, they work on the ‘drop and go’ method.  This avoids any water works, both from mom’s and baby girl’s side)  and I am sure she smiles even bigger when she sees daddy when he fetches her.  I trust that she is being taken care of very well.  I have not noticed any weird behaviour, except that she is really tired when she gets home.  There is a little bit of play time with mom and dad.  Bath time. Bottle time. Sleep time. Until…

Baby girl has been waking up once, maybe twice a night.  She drinks her milk, maybe its a dirty nappy and THEN, it takes about an hour to get her back to sleep.  This is between 1 – 3 o’ clock in the morning.  We then have to get up again at around 6 – 6:30, to get ready for work and play school.  I am knackered! Besides that, this cutting teeth thing, is definitely no fun and games. In the beginning it was lots of drooling and chewing stuff and now, well, lets just say it has become a very messy situation.  I am constantly at the washing machine, so that no stains later become anyhow difficult to remove ( just being a little bit paranoid, I know). She also has a runny nose and a bit of a cough, which also makes it harder to stay asleep.  Giving her all sorts of powders and gels, seems only to help for few minutes.  Paracetamol is probably overrated but some may use it.  Giving her frozen toys to chew on also only keeps her entertained for so long.  This too shall past the pros say…

It’s been a rough weekend.  Lots of runny poops and on and off sleeping patterns. But hey, she is still smiling and trying to crawl her way around. As long as baby girl is happy, mommy’s happy (and sleep deprived).

I am now not trying to fall asleep at work…

 

Back to work!

So far it has not been bad at all.  Maybe it’s because I know she is with my mother, whom she recognises immediately when walking into a room.  But next week I will be handing her over to total strangers.  I get all teary eyes just thinking about it.  I keep telling myself I am not a bad mother for doing it nor is it totally the wrong thing to do.  It just really makes me sad to think that this tiny baby has to stay for almost eight hours with not her parents, but with someone she has never spend a day with.  I also keep telling myself that these people are professionals and have been doing this for years. Needless to say, it is going to be a big adjustment for the both of us.

There will obviously be people thinking that seven months is way to young to start going to school.  Some mothers only send there kids to school from 2 – 3 years old and then that’s only half days to socialize with other kids.  But when you don’t have a choise, then unfortunately you have to do what you got to do.  I just hope and pray that all works out for the best.

Chosing a play school is a crucial decision.  Not only is this the place that your child will spend most of her time, but she will be spending time with other kids and with one specific teacher.  My advise would be is to ‘shop’ around, a lot. Play schools that are close to your work or your partner’s work are always a plus point.  If logistics don’t work out, look at schools with enough room where kids can play and run around.  Do they have enough room to sleep.  Food options. Are fresh fruits and vegetable daily prepared for them. Good healthy food options should be a must.  Are they sharing bedtime and feeding times with older children in the same room or are the babies in their own building/room.  Look at places that come recommended by your friends or school teachers.  Visit play schools without appointments.  This will ensure that you experience the school as is.  Go with your gut feeling.  If you don’t like it, then look at the next one.  If one of the teachers or the principal give you the jeepers creepers, then opt for some place else.  You as a parent must feel at ease and comfortable with the people working there.

I am very lucky to have had the opportunity to place Baby Girl in a school 5 minutes from my partners workplace.  Half an hour from my mother and its also situated in a beautiful area, close to where I  grew up! Lots of play areas outside, farm animals to feed.  Tractor rides, horse riding and so many more thing to do outside.  I am very happy with my choise and I have a good feeling that all will be great this year.  This school will most probably become her second home for the next 5 years!

Moms and Dads, go with that six sence.  If your friends recommend a certain school, know that they will not put your child’s life at risk.  There are so many options, play schools, day mothers and nannies.  At the end of the day, go with what suits your lifestyle and pocket.  Remember, this is your child’s future we are talking about, make it a fantastic one!

Join the #butterflyrevolution

Most of us remember the horrific day that took place 22 years ago.  A young woman was kidnapped in front of her house and driven to an isolated area where she was brutally attacked and raped.  She was stabbed 30 times and her throat slit open.  She was left to die.  Alison Botha needed a hero and then she became one.

Not all woman are as lucky as Alison.  There are so many of these types of cases happening, most of them not even being reported to the police or made public via media.  It is sad what the world has come to. Unfortunately not only women are being abused, but children as well.  Any form of abuse infuriates me.  Human or animal abuse.  Just the other day, a man was arrested for killing his 3-year-old stepdaughter.  In court he had the audacity to say that this child had no manners and had a mind of her own. So he kicked her to death. What normal human being abuses a child? That’s right, these people are not normal, but psychologically disturb.   There are so many of these videos on social media showing how nannies abuse babies. Babies! Beings that can not talk or defend themselves.  How dare you hit a child in the face or tie them up with chains?! and then you want to blame the child for your abusive behaviour? Don’t want to look after them, don’t portray yourself as a nanny. Don’t want to get pregnant, then get sterilized! No innocent child deserves to be treated like that.

These abusers need to be locked up and slowly brutally die inside prison.  How dare we as a society let abusers get away with this behaviour? How can the government let these people roam amongst us, among our own children.  Social workers are trying so hard to help women and children in need, but without the necessary funds and facilities, there is not much that they can do, but send these people back into the abusive situation.

We as parents should also take responsiblity for how we raise our children.  Focus on teaching them about being respectful towards one and another and to show loyalty towards friends and family. Boys should be taught how real men behave and girls should know that they can be powerful and independent and all children should grow up with homes filled with love. Appropriate behaviour starts at home. Then there is the #butterflyrevolution.

butterflyrevolutionposterThe #ButterflyRevolution brings together people who care about other people and want to make a change in the world.  Women and children abuse need to come to an end and only we as a society can stand together and make a difference, even if we start small.  Small ideas can lead to big changes.  We all can be heroes.

Six months already?!

6months-subscriptionI honestly can say that these past six months have gone by really fast.  This year has flown by. Christmas is around the corner (19 days to go) and then we enter a new year, filled with more challenges and adventures.

I can not believe that Baby Girl is 6 months old (young).  The past month has had more downs then ups. I assume that she is starting to get them teeth, eish. Which means not a lot of sleep for me or Baby girl.  She’s become very moody, almost like those two weeks before your period starts, when you are at your worst, well that’s her. Nothing is right, just when you think you have done something great and she smiles from ear to ear, tears and lots of screaming takes over. But it only last that long. Then we struggle to take a nap (in the end we don’t nap, so we stay up and then once again become tired, but not wanting to sleep and so it continues). Otherwise, all is well.  She is rolling, sitting, holding her bottle, eating solids, loving bath time and loving nature. Note: when struggeling to get baby to calm down, let baby watch the leaves on the trees blow in the wind, soothing and calming effect.

This is also my last month of maternity leave.  I have mixed emotions.  I am sort of ready to start working again in January, but then I am not that ready to leave her with strangers.  I don’t know how she will adapt and I do hope these teachers have a lot a patience.  They should have right?  Just knowing what I go through in a day…maybe Baby Girl just likes testing my patience, because she shows more than enough happiness when her dad walks into a room.  Maybe she is tired of my face? I hope not. But maybe some change will do us both good.

Like I have mentioned, there has been a lot of downs, but when she smiles, my heart melts.  She is precious in every single way and I am honoured to be her mom.  I think what really has been challenging is doing a lot of things on my own, when help was not always available.  I think that you need to go out more with friends or go to the gym or the movies, just to get some grown up sanity back again.  I take my hat off for moms that have two kids or more and they have to take care of everything without any help. Good golly.  It’s hard sometimes…

So here is my advise, if you have that day when you feeling blue and you just need some alone time, then you need to get out! Call a grandma or that friend that said that she would babysit anytime, and take some time for yourself.  Even if it’s just a long nap.  You need to breathe (get some oxygen into that brain again) and take back control, not just for your own good but for your baby’s as well.  We need to love motherhood and should not be loafing it.

So here’s to the next six months! (Then Baby Girl will be One Year old!) Hip hip Hooray and Cheers!

Opinionated much?

I don’t mind the occasional ‘here and there’ advise given by a parent. “Use it or don’t use it” most will say, because most parents know that not all babies are the same.  Not all babies will necessarily achieve their milestone goals at the same age, so don’t fret if your baby has not started walking on his own at 11 or 12 months and your friend’s baby is already doing it at the same age.  They will get there eventually.  They might just enjoy doing other activities more.

What really gets to me are these people who don’t have any children, but will always, not give advise, but give their opinion. Say what? You, the person who has not been in labour for hours, not once, wants give me an opinion? Please have a baby first and then we can maybe have a conversation about sleeping schedules and breastfeeding.  The baby will not be handed to you on a golden platter with a manual on how to use. No. You can plan when you want to have you baby, not going to happen on that date.  You can think that you are going to let your baby sleep in his own room starting from three months. You can actually assume a lot of things before birth, but once that baby is here, most of those assumptions will fly out of the window and you just have to take each day as it comes.( Unless you are Hitler and you are totally going to dictate your baby’s life). You will either have a happy baby, colic baby, baby that don’t want to latch, really calm baby, really busy baby, the list goes on.  You will never know how your baby will react to certain situations. (and don’t even think they’ll behave like you or your husband…)

So people without babies/children.  Don’t give me your opinion (even behind my back, that’s just rude by the way).  Lets chat again once you got that very special little person in your life. Maybe then I’ll even give some advise, use it or don’t use it…